Dating Hiatus

Scribbles is officially over it.

After a semi-disasterous rebound relationship earlier this year and less than stellar experiences through internet dating, I am hereby resigning from all dating activity for the rest of 2009.

Isn't that a little bit extreme? Well, not really. We only have a month to go and I have so much on that dating just in the hopes of finding Mr. Right drops to the bottom of the priority of the list. If we focus on even just the element of time-wasting dates, it makes sense to push out the hiatus until the end of January. I'd rather spend the spare time I have spending time with wonderful people already in my life.

I won't deny it - I am looking for Mr. Right... I fail to see the point in dating someone just for the sake of having someone to cuddle. If he doesn't take my breath away, if he doesn't have the same league of goals and ambitions that I have, if he doesn't have the same values... it's not worth it. I've come to terms with the fact that this guy will be a rare creature and I'm probably not going to find him on the internet. I do believe this man is out there, but he'll come along when the time is good and ready and nothing I'm going to do is rush that.

I'm not saying the next guy I date will be the forever guy - sometimes you think someone is perfect until you get to know them better. This time I give myself off from dating lets me get to know myself better too. Building a life outside of what I want outside of a relationship is what's important to me right now, and my prince can come along when I have no more dragons left to slay :D

Your thoughts? Have you ever imposed a dating hiatus on yourself?

7 comments:

  1. hey scribbles!
    Now I know what you meant when you said you thought I may be interested in this post!
    I have been single for almost 2 years and haven't even dated! I haven't necessarily imposed a dating hiatus on myself though, the time just hasn't been right.
    I came out of a rather horrible breakup last year and since then I have taken the time to be with my best friends and family. I haven't felt as though I need anyone else (even though it would be nice for cuddles etc) as I have been getting to know myself and I am not really interested in going through a huge dating phase. I figure that when I meet the person, hopefully I will know... call me a hopeless romantic but I am just not interested in going through all the men in Tasmania in the hopes I will find the right one! when the time is right, it will be right, but for now I have too much on- uni, work, travels. I am really just trying to get my life in focus, because for too long I was always putting someone else before me.
    I must say, it has been a good couple of years on my own; I have been able to focus on what I want to do and really acknowledge my values etc and not have my ideals swayed by someone elses. Hopefully when I meet someone else, I will be happy with being myself and continue to let my personality etc develop (but not to reflect theirs).
    I really do believe that you have to be happy and comfortable with yourself before you can be happy and comfortable with someone else. Hope that helps :)
    alla

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have never imposed a 'dating hiatus' on myself as such, although there did come a time in my life where I decided that I wouldn't waste my time with guys whom I didn't see a future with...
    Also, side note, but we totally have the same header! The 'life, love and literature' part. What a trip! Must be something to do with the English teacher gene ;).

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey darlin'!

    Thanks so much for your interest in the Cocoa Book Club! If you don't mind, I'd really appreciate it if you could give me your e-mail address so I can add you to the roster of future book clubbers and get in contact with you straight away when it's your turn to pick up a book!

    Thanks, honey, and keep reading!

    Always,
    Penelope ♥

    ReplyDelete
  4. You know, i've never imposed a dating hiatus before but i have always given myself plenty of time after a relationship to get back to being me. Luckily i'm in a long term relationship at the moment, but they always have their ups and downs. I know this is so cliche, but if you stop looking and being bound to either find this person or going on a dating hiatus you may just miss the person that could have been mr right. I say enjoy yourself, go out with friends, live your life for you but always be open to people who may come along - because you never really know when they will :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have! But then I'm very much the virgo and inclined towards declarations of all sorts. "I will now commence to find a serious relationship." "I will now commence to take a dating break."

    Though, honestly, the latter didn't really work and I met a guy I dated for five years. But it was nice to take an official hiatus. I didn't have to be 'on' at parties or wear anything impressive or make polite small talk with the guy from marketing. I could just talk about books, whilst wearing yoga pants and ignore double entendres. :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Alla - I know what you mean about not wanting to date the entire population to find just one :D
    @Erin - snap! English teachers always have a sense of the romantic I think :D
    @PaperDoll... good advice, and I think that if someone marvellous did come along I wouldn't tell him to go away... I hope not anyway!
    @Sarah Von - I'm starting to wonder whether I am a virgo in hiding LOL. I think the reasons that you outlined are really the reasons I've decided to do this :D
    @Miss_Corrine - single buddies!

    ReplyDelete